{"id":140,"date":"2018-02-28T04:04:25","date_gmt":"2018-02-28T04:04:25","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/samaritanps.org\/sandbox-6-30-2018\/?p=140"},"modified":"2018-05-17T13:36:01","modified_gmt":"2018-05-17T13:36:01","slug":"hold-me-tight-can-be-good-for-couples","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/samaritanps.org\/sandbox-6-30-2018\/news-and-insights\/hold-me-tight-can-be-good-for-couples\/","title":{"rendered":"“Hold Me Tight Can Be Good For Couples”"},"content":{"rendered":"
    \n
  1. Get two copies of the book so that each of you has your own personal copy and, if you want to make notes of your responses and ideas in it, you can.<\/li>\n
  2. Approach your reading together with \u201ca teachable spirit.\u201d\u00a0 As you consider your relationship, agree that you\u2019ll refrain from staying too much in your head or repeating old, unhelpful patterns of thought. Be willing to go to your heart.<\/li>\n
  3. Take your time.\u00a0 Read the book aloud to each other, one brief section (about 3-5 pages) of a chapter each day. As one of you reads aloud, the other can follow along in his or her own copy of the book so that the ideas are coming in both through your ears and your eyes. Given the busy lives most couples have, it\u2019s realistic to allow three or four months in which to read the book in this manner.\u00a0 Agree that you will stay together, reading at the same pace.<\/li>\n
  4. When you\u2019ve read the day\u2019s section, talk to each other about what things caught your attention and why these are meaningful to you.\u00a0 Consider the questions the author raised.<\/li>\n
  5. Let yourselves fully enter into the stories of the couples in the book. Try reading them as if you were in a play, speaking the lines to each other. It can be surprising and empowering to hear yourself and your partner saying words that, in your own relationship, tend to lead to a meltdown. You\u2019ll find that using a \u2018script\u2019 can increase your \u2018awareness capacity\u2019 — the ability to observe your own negative patterns of communication in real time. When you can see the patterns, you can change them \u2013 transforming problematic interaction into communication that is grounded in mutual respect and creates greater closeness. You can move from \u201cstand-off\u201d to \u201cstand together.\u201d<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    (For a similar and specifically Christian book, see Safe Haven Marriage by Sharon Hart-Morris and Archibald Hart.)\u00a0 More information about Susan Johnson\u2019s book is available at:
    \nhttp:\/\/holdmetight.net\/video.php;<\/a> http:\/\/holdmetight.net\/audio_interviews.php.<\/a><\/p>\n

    Johnson, S. (2008) Hold Me Tight. Lebanon, IN: Hachette Book Group\/Little, Brown and Company.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    Couples can read this book together in a teachable spirit.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[90,89],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-140","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-resources","category-skills-tools"],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p9HFgk-2g","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/samaritanps.org\/sandbox-6-30-2018\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/140","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/samaritanps.org\/sandbox-6-30-2018\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/samaritanps.org\/sandbox-6-30-2018\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/samaritanps.org\/sandbox-6-30-2018\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/samaritanps.org\/sandbox-6-30-2018\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=140"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/samaritanps.org\/sandbox-6-30-2018\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/140\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":544,"href":"https:\/\/samaritanps.org\/sandbox-6-30-2018\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/140\/revisions\/544"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/samaritanps.org\/sandbox-6-30-2018\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=140"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/samaritanps.org\/sandbox-6-30-2018\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=140"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/samaritanps.org\/sandbox-6-30-2018\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=140"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}